THE GODLESS PARSON!

A short story

By

John Roberts(1998)

The Parson.

Jacob Adamson slowly turned the pages of the sacred scriptures, seeking an appropriate text for his forthcoming Sunday Sermon. It was always an ordeal for this precise, pragmatic man, Rector of Allmansby Parish, in the County of Lancaster. Adamson was a man of about fifty years. He was tall, with greying dark hair and keen brown eyes . In build he was slim and kept himself in trim by walking his Parish each day.

Adamson’s Parish covered a district of hills and moor-land, with straggling houses lining the valley bottoms. Here and there a derelict mill testified to the once arduous though tolerably prosperous lives of the people of the cotton towns.

Adamson had chosen the life of a clergyman of the Church of England, almost as a matter of course. His parents: ardent Anglicans, themselves, had been delighted when their only child had indicated a preference for the Church, as a career. His motive had been largely due to an absence in his personal characteristics of the faculty of ambition. He had no greater desire in life than that of obtaining a comfortable and easy living. He had no great regard for material possessions: perhaps realizing sub-consciously, that there is nothing in this life that has attached to it the quality of permanence.

Academically, he had not achieved distinction: having obtained a BA degree in one of the lesser- known Universities and had subsequently been ordained into the Anglican Church. After twenty-five years in the Church, he appeared set to spend the remainder of his days as Rector of Allmansby.

At the age of 30 years, he had married Kate Summers, by whom he had two girls: Isabel, now aged 18yrs and Jane, 16yrs. The girls, naturally, were closer to their mother than to Jacob himself, although his attitude, generally, towards his wife and daughters was affectionate, if somewhat distant.

In matters of doctrine, Jacob unquestionably accepted the 39 Articles of the Anglican Communion and faithfully fulfilled the ritual obligations of his calling. In this respect, he was an ideal clergyman: untroubled by theological problems. Jacob had never given thought to the primary question of the "existence" of a Deity . Indeed, the subject had never occurred to him. He saw the world as existing and himself at its centre.

As to the Sacraments: he administered these very much as a Dentist administers anaesthetic: without questioning their effectiveness. In Church he adopted a bland, ritualistic demeanour, appropriate to these occasions, producing every appearance of satisfaction on the part of his Parishioners: who demanded nothing more of their Pastor.

His attitude towards his flock was, privately, that of benevolent contempt. One or two of the more intelligent and sensitive members of his congregation evoked in him a degree of empathy, but for the vast bulk of his parishioners he felt little warmth or personal regard. Jacob was judicious enough to conceal the nature of his feelings towards the more empty-headed members of his congregation.

Life had continued, to date, very much as a routine affair, until this particular Monday morning, as he slowly turned the pages of his Testament. His gaze alighted on the text in the Gospel of John, Chapter 4, Verse 24: "God is Spirit and those who worship must worship in Spirit and in truth". He had read this passage many times, previously, but it had never impressed him as it did now. "What on earth does this mean?" mused the Parson. "God is Spirit! - worship in Spirit! Can man worship God? What do we mean by 'God'? Jahweh!? Catholics accept that Jesus is God: is identified fully with God. Is Jesus also Spirit? What is Spirit? It is altogether too confusing. How can I go on, year after year, as a teacher of God's flock, with hardly any conception of what I mean by 'God' Is it not all just a wonderful fairy-tale? This story of Jesus healing the sick and being transported bodily to Heaven, after being well and truly crucified? Can I conscientiously accept the validity of that argument? Now I read that God is Spirit and not of the flesh. How then can Jesus have been resurrected in the flesh when we see this reference to the "reality" of Spirit? If, indeed, there is a God and this God is Spirit, then man himself must in some sense participate of the Spirit: he must be able to 'worship in Spirit'. It is not just a figure of speech." He continued, "If the resurrection of Jesus occurred in a Spiritual and not a physical sense, then the whole basis of the doctrine of the Christian Church is undermined!"

Chapter 2

The Rector of Herringbottom.

At this point, Jacob's reverie was interrupted by a knock on his study door, followed by the face of his wife, as she opened and peeped around the door. "Oliver Wilson is here to see you, Jacob". "Send him in!" responded her husband. Kate's face was now replaced by that of a short, plump, jovial man in dog collar and grey suit. "How-do-you-do Jacob? So very good to see you! I thought I would drop-in to say 'hello!', as I was passing-by." Jacob rose and the two men shook hands warmly. "Good to see you again, Oliver."

They had been friends for a number of years: Oliver being Rector of Herringbottom, the adjoining Parish. "Sit down my friend: I am in need of support at the moment.", said Jacob. "I have been thinking about a passage in the Gospel of John, Chapter 4, which states that, 'God is Spirit and that those who worship must worship in spirit and in truth'. What the dickens does this mean?"

"Well", responded his friend. "You are encroaching on dangerous ground here. The Church has not been disposed to encourage unrestricted discussion of this topic, for obvious reasons. The King James Version talks about God being 'a' spirit, which is a far different thing from 'Spirit' itself. When you talk about 'a spirit' you are defining God very narrowly indeed, whereas 'spirit' is limitless in extent. I myself prefer the concept of 'spirit', as I cannot begin to conceive of God in such a narrow and limited way".

"You know, Oliver, I have never given much thought to the matter but I doubt if I believe in the existence of a God, as generally accepted within the Church. I begin to wonder what on earth I am doing here at all! How can I presume to teach others, when I have no concept of a Divine Being?"

"Well”, said Oliver, “You have reached a watershed in your life, just when I was beginning to think that there was no depth to you, you reveal a latent capacity for theological speculation. This is truly a wonderful development, for it is in the realm of search and enquiry, that man attains to perception of spiritual things."

"What on earth do you mean?", exclaimed the now, thoroughly confused, Jacob. Oliver responded: "Well might Our Lord refer to the fact that the perception of spiritual truths was the preserve of the "babes and sucklings" of the intellectual world. It is evident that you have little concept of the true nature of Man and his relationship towards his Creator, in spite of your years within the bosom of the Church." He now continued: "Do you not understand that the only way one can begin to conceive of the Creator is through the medium of prayer: through personal experience of the Divine presence?" "How is it possible for you to know this?", replied the astonished Jacob.

"This passage which you have quoted and which has disturbed you so deeply, contains the germ of a great truth. God is, indeed, 'Spirit' and it is possible for you to experience the presence of God through spiritual worship: that is the offering of yourself in a spiritual sense, to your Creator. It is possible for everyone to enjoy this sense of the Divine Love and Compassion: of the overwhelming power and love of the Creator. The avenue to God is through prayer: not the meaningless repetitive phrases used by the Church, generally, but by the offering of extemporary and sincere prayer to the Creator God: in gratitude and acknowledgement of the blessings of this life".

"But what about the doctrines of the Fall and the Vicarious Atonement of Christ? Are they not valid propositions?" "Judeo-Christian mythology, my dear Jacob", replied his colleague. "But aren't these teachings the very basis of Christian theology?", responded Jacob. "What about Paul's teaching of Justification by Faith?" "Paul had to resolve his own personal problem of his early persecution of the Christians. He decided that as his work had been evil, his faith must be the only factor that would save him. James had more common sense. He stated, quite correctly, that 'Faith without works is dead'. In fact the letter of James makes truly Christian reading".

"I am astonished to hear you speak in this manner! How can you know these truths?" cried Jacob. Oliver now responded, "Did not Jesus give us this promise: 'that those who ask shall receive, that to those who knock it will be opened: that those who seek shall find'. He was referring, undoubtedly, to spiritual perception: to the understanding of spiritual truths. I have understood these things for many years."

Oliver now continued: "Jacob, it is wonderful that you should at last seek this understanding! You are indeed, well blest, for you are at the threshold of a new life!" In his enthusiasm, Oliver rose from his chair and grasped his friend by the hand. "All you can do now is to ask for guidance in these things and you will emerge from your dilemma with a renewed and clearer understanding of your purpose in life. Now I must be off, for to tell the truth, I did not come prepared to engage in a lengthy theological discussion. However, perhaps I have given you some food for thought."

"You certainly have, my friend, and I will think about your remarks. Goodbye and my sincere thanks for your inspiring words to me this morning." "Inspiring nonsense!", returned Oliver. "They were just my natural response to your situation and I hope they may prove to be of value to you. Goodbye and God Bless you, my friend!"

With these words, the good Rector of Herringbottom turned abruptly and left the room, leaving Jacob in a state of emotional shock. He had certainly received much food for thought and sat for some time, pondering his situation, before proceeding to try to sort out his thoughts regarding the Sermon for the following Sunday.

Chapter 3

A Visitation

When Jacob Adamson retired to rest that night, as he lay down, he thought about the words of his friend, relative to prayer. He would not have cared to admit publicly that he was unaccustomed to "saying his prayers", at least in private. However, he decided that it could do no harm for him to utter a subjective request for guidance and help in his present predicament. He, therefore, composed himself mentally and uttered the following silent prayer:

"Oh! Thou unknown Spirit of God! In the extremity of my distress and confusion, I offer myself sincerely to Thee and ask for guidance: that I may have an understanding of spiritual things and, perhaps, reinforced in my faith, may serve both Thee and my Parishioners with increased confidence and devotion: Amen."

Having completed this short invocation, he kissed his wife "Goodnight!", turned over and slept. He continued this practice for some time, varying his prayers in accordance with his mood.

One night, a week or so subsequent to his discussion with Oliver, he slept soundly, but towards morning he dreamed that he was walking through a marshy ground: wallowing badly in a deep, sticky mire. He struggled valiantly but could make but little progress. His steps seemed to be particularly slow and difficult, as though he had ten-pound weights on each shoe.

However, there now appeared a tiny but brilliant point of light, some distance ahead, to which he directed his steps . It seemed that he made a more rapid progress and before long found himself on firm ground, gazing at a castellated building, constructed upon a slight elevation, from a window of which the light now shone with intense brilliance. He felt strangely small and insignificant, as if he were, once more, a little child. As he gazed in rapture and amazement at the light, he was overwhelmed by a sensation of wond’rous love and compassion: which he had never known before. It seemed to him that this compassion was for the sins and follies of mankind and appeared to comprehend and infinitely understand the nature of human weakness.

He felt drawn towards the light but as he approached, his dream changed. Jacob now found himself in an open area, in the centre of which stood a man of Oriental appearance. He spoke to this man and said, "Hello! I must tell you of my experience, which was so wonderful!". The Chinaman, for such he proved to be, said, "We have been waiting for a long time for you to do something about yourself." "What do you mean?" said Jacob. "I have been doing my best." "You have been enjoying life: serving yourself all these years. Now you must really serve your fellow men. A man cannot say that I love God and hate his brother, nor can he offer service to God with contempt within his heart for any man. You must take this message to your fellow-men." "I certainly will!", replied Jacob. He now awoke: astonished but delighted with his experience.

His wife was already awake and he told her of his dream, saying, "I will no longer doubt the reality of Divine Guidance, as I see that God reveals himself to his children in many ways." "Well!", responded Kate, herself intelligent and sensible to boot: "You have to remember that this is a purely subjective experience on your part and you cannot expect anyone to believe that you have really received a message from God." "I agree, but you cannot take away from me the importance of the event. It has really changed my life. I will, in future, try to teach people about the love and compassion of the Creator."

And Jacob was true to his promise. He re-read the New Testament, noting those passages which were relevant to his new-found principles. In his Sermon that Sunday he amazed his Parishioners by his exposition of the truth of the Love and Wisdom of the Creator God. He did not reveal the nature of his enlightenment, nor did he claim to be "saved" as a result of his experience: but he knew that he had taken the first step on the ladder of his own spiritual progression.

THE END

mailto:robertsjno@gmail.com

7th Apr 98